I am horrified by what is happening in the U.S. The level of racism and hatred and violence is increasing. I’m sickened but can’t stop watching. I’m triggered but still can’t stop watching.

I kept wanting to share anti-racist memes on Facebook. Something kept stopping me. It felt like an easy pass – “I posted this, so I’ve done my part now”. I felt I needed to go deeper. I started wondering what I can do PERSONALLY in day to day life. How can I be sure I’m not accidentally saying or doing the wrong things?

“Oh, it’s not that bad in Canada” you say? That is the worst argument ever for ignoring this. It is happening here too and eventually will escalate if we don’t stop it now. Most Canadians have friends or family in the U.S. and Canada. We have influence, even if it is a small influence.

I believe we are ALL human beings regardless of our appearance. Regardless of any other label that gets attached to a person. Personally, I hate labels. I feel that they divide us even more.

I understand that special interest groups are formed to provide a stronger voice, to fight for inclusion and equality – but I so wish they were not necessary. Wouldn’t it be a better world if special interest groups formed to share and celebrate their common characteristics, rather than huddling together for survival and safety?

I believe everyone deserves to be treated with respect and compassion. The only place we should be judged is in court as a direct result of our actions – and there is a (usually peaceful) process for that.

What CAN I do personally?

It’s easier to see why people react the way they do when we understand their story. Being on the receiving side of racism is traumatic. I can’t even begin to understand what that is like. What’s happening now is yet another full-on cultural trauma that will be felt for generations.

Examining my own white privilege and biases is eye opening. Admitting I need to change is scary. It triggers a few of my own trauma reactions. But I am not letting that stop me.

There is so much healing needed – for the entire country, both U.S. and Canada. I encourage you to have these discussions with your family and your friends.

My husband and I had a good discussion about this yesterday. We talked about what is happening in the U.S. We examined a few of our biases. We talked about how we can change our biases by learning about different cultures to understand their beliefs. We will continue to discuss it and we both want to do our part to change it.

I can challenge the family member who talks trash about people because of their appearance or their culture. I already do that. What do they know about that person’s experience or culture? Can I share what I have learned? I need to learn more, and I need to pay attention to when my biases pop up. We all have them.

I can refuse to engage in conversations or actions that insult and harm another human being. Speak up, say I am not willing to be a part of this, walk away, or challenge their point of view. I already do that, although not as well as I would like. The need to be included in a group is sometimes stronger than my moral compass.

What can you do?

Can you think of a time when you didn’t speak up on someone’s behalf – and wish you had?

Will you refuse to take on clients who are racist? And how will you screen them, so you KNOW their values?

Will you refuse to hire people – employees or businesses – who don’t value equality? How do we even do this? I admit, it is an extra step when we need to hire a company to fix the furnace or paint the ceilings. I think it is worth it, even though I’m not sure how to go about it. Is it as simple as checking their website to read their inclusion policies?

We can ALL step up

We ALL need to do something. Even if it is a small thing. Because those small things add up. And we can change this. I keep thinking about what I can do personally in my self isolation bubble.

Memes have their place but the ones I see right now fire people up without giving them an outlet for big emotions. Instead of sharing memes on Facebook, I think I would rather share resources that can help us take right actions.

Today’s resource

Rachel Ricketts’ website. It landed in my email today so I am checking it out. I read this checklist today. I see there are things I can work on. Check it out and see what you find.

What can you do? What WILL you do? Post in the comments if you know of a good resource or have ideas to share.